I’d like to say that I’m more happy now then I was a year ago but the simple fact is, I’m not. I don’t have the stress of trying to be something I’m not. I’m not trying to live up to ideas in my head of what it means to be “a family man” and what a relationship is suppose to be like. A year later I don’t have that. However just because I don’t have those demons riding my back anymore doesn’t mean that life is all wonderful. Maybe this is more about how I treat myself and who I am as a person, someone who can never be happy. Im not happy, it’s tough to live mostly on your own, your never sure if what you are doing is the right thing. Money becomes the monster that was just a troll before. You get the freedom to do what you want but life becomes lonely at the time. Sometimes I’m not sure what it is that I want anymore, maybe I never did. Im not happy but I don’t think that anyone else is to blame but myself.